• Endria Richardson

finegan beginegan

Updated: Nov 10

There is no guiding light so you should remember that above everything. There is nothing to set you right except yourself. The clock tolls and you think it gives you a semblance of something to set your day by and your days something to set your years by and so on or even gives you the mechanism itself but if you thought of an hour as a sphere or even twenty four hours as a sphere or even all of time as it’s ever been just one neverending nonbeginning bulging globe.

I don’t really think about time because I don’t know how to. I just move in it whichever way it chooses for me, I guess you could say I am a passive traveler or a fish caught in some current but at least the fish probably knows if it’s going forwards or backwards. I may not even be moving. Time may be moving right over my surface like a soft wind brushing the stones of time from one side to the other and my ignorant mass is the obstacle it must pass before starting over again anew. You can almost see it as though a camera pulled back and shot the surface of all being as a desert and my naked body and the sands of time flowing across that body, lying like some neverending dividing line like it stretched in opposition to fact from the beginning of land to the end and was not confined in its own physical truncation and all of the sand must cross that figurative desert of a body and pile up around its other side in gentle waving dunes stretching back as far as anybody could see or care to see. And when the originating side was empty of every grain it would all begin again.

I am very interested in things beginning again. There is so much that can occur, so many lines that can erupt from a single dot. And to be on one line for all of your life? And to not know: where do I go? Why am I going? From whence did I come, to what do I go? I am a simple line, I am a mistaken path. And it trails me wherever I go, like a smear of shit behind me, it follows, it is unshakable, it multiplies: they are my choices, they are the things I choose to do, they are the things I do not care to know, they are my sparrows lined up for me in a straight line twittering that I am wrong I am wrong I am selfish I am wrong.

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